Family New Muslims

Family Life: Lessons from the Qur’an

How do you play your role in your family, community, and in life? How do you manage your family relations? What kind of a family member are you? Ponder on these verses of the Qur’an and apply their lessons in your life in general and family life in particular.

The Qur’an is not a storybook of wondrous tales and ancient fables, isolated from the realities and complexities of real life. Each verse, in fact, each letter is miraculously endowed with the precision of meaning, succinctness of message and purity of sound.

Family Comes First

The more you look into the Qur’an and approach it with a sincere heart, give it your attention while assuming its magnificence, the more your heart connects with the Al-Mighty.

The life lessons that can be taken from any surah are amazing, but Surat Ṭa-Ha in particular is unique in this regard.

Here I will reflect on the life lessons that can be derived from Surat Ṭa-Ha (the 20th chapter of the Qur’an which chronicles the life of Musa. Commentators point out that apart from two short references to Musa in earlier surahs:Or, has he not been informed of what is in the scriptures of Musa?” (Al-Kahf 53:36) and “The scriptures of Abraham and Moses” (Al-A`la 87:19), the narrative appearing in Surat Ṭa-Ha, particularly the verses 9–98, is undoubtedly the earliest Qur’anic exposition of the story of Musa.

Life lessons from the Qur’an are infinite. The more you look into the Qur’an and approach it with a sincere heart, give it your attention while assuming its magnificence, the more your heart connects with the Al-Mighty.

Has the story of Moses come to you (Prophet)? He saw a fire and said to his people, “Stay here – I can see a fire. Maybe I can bring you a flaming brand from it or find some guidance there”. (Al-Kahf 20:9-10)

These two verses contain many important lessons that I think we can all benefit from. In particular we can focus on ten important lessons that impact our family life. This does not limit, of course, business and management applications, educational considerations, and other professional dimensions.

Life Lessons

1- Family Comes First

Musa (peace be upon him) seeks to ensure his family’s safety and comfort by asking them to wait for him in the cold darkness of the night while he departs to investigate the source of fire at a distance from them. Never compromise your family and lead them into the unknown.

2- Present Danger is Better Than Hidden Danger

Musa knows it is dangerous to leave his family in the dark expanse of the desert that they lost their way in. Yet, that is less a danger than walking into a campfire of what could possibly be a group of brigands who would harm him and his family. The known danger is clear and evident, but at least it is predictable.

3- Danger to One Is Better Than Exposing Many

Musa instinctively decides that the danger faced by him, alone, is worth the risk of warmth and guidance to safety. Judgment is imperative when a preponderance of danger exists. The less exposure, whether financially, psychologically, spiritually and physically, the better.

4- One Person Takes the Final Decision

In trying circumstances, defined, clear and unambiguous directions can be the difference between life and death, health and sickness, safety and tragedy. In all decisions, especially within the household, a unified singular voice needs to provide leadership and direction.

5- Leaders Consult & Explain Their Decision Making Process

Musa explains, in detail, why he has made the decision to investigate the fire and to leave his family behind. It is reasoned, rational and explicit. Often, complaints arise about a decision being made without consultation and explanation. That contradicts the established prophetic model. Decisions are not demands and the authority to make them is not inherent to one party over another except by virtue of trust. Trust is lost not by poor decisions but by poor consultation.

6- Speak to All Whom Your Decision Impacts

Musa spoke to all his family/people, not just his wife. Taking counsel with your sons and daughters in important decisions is a way of ensuring reciprocation when they reach an age of decision making ability for themselves. If you ignore their voices, then expect them not to share it with you.

7- Don’t Promise What Is Not Assured

Musa says, “Maybe/perhaps I can bring you” (Al-Kahf 20:10) and does not speak in definite. Nothing undermines credibility of a parent with their children more than unfulfilled promises. The greatest wedge between a husband and wife are vows that are not maintained and assurances not met. Speak the truth and do not embellish.

8- Maximize Your Benefit from Assumed Danger

Musa calculates what he stands to gain; warmth, light, guidance out of the desert, return with a flaming brand and more.  Always seek maximum benefit, even from precarious situations that others may view as a complete loss.

9- Prioritize

Musa speaks about warmth and a flaming brand to return with and provide comfort and light for his family, before he speaks about finding their way. He understands the greatest need and seeks to fulfill it before other essentials.

10- Take Responsibility

Musa says “I can” (Al-Kahf 20:10) to legitimize his decision. He assumes responsibility for the decision and intends a positive outcome, even though he does not guarantee it. Families disintegrate due to a lack of responsibility. Standing up and assuming leadership equally necessitates being responsible when things go bad.

The Qur’an alludes to all human experience and seeks to enrich the finite time we spend on earth before our return to our Maker the Most High.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was commanded to follow his predecessors and take heed from their trials while finding inspiration in their eventual divinely ordained triumph.

Allah, the Most High, encourages us to look into the final Word and take heed of its lessons and parable:

And We have certainly diversified in this Qur’an for the people from every (kind of) example; but man has ever been, most of anything, (prone to) dispute. (Al-Kahf 20:54)




By Hanif Kruger

BIO for Hanif Kruger

Hanif is the manager at the Assistive Technology Centre of the South African National Council for the Blind with more than 30 years of experience in the assistive technology and IT fields. Hanif’s passion is assistive technology and advocating for key issues affecting people with disabilities and more specifically the blind and vision impaired. He shares his love for Assistive Technologies through sharing information through his work and via social media and relevant events in order to spread the knowledge and awareness around new technologies and the challenges relating to AT for PWDs. A strong believer in the rights of persons with disabilities and the philosophy of “nothing about us without us”, he regularly push for the affordability and accessability of AT and matching the correct assistive technology solutions with a person in order for them to reach their full capacity. Hanif enjoys a good Netflix and Apple TV+ binge but can also be found walking both his guide dogs looking for cookies .

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